Demon Within Read online

  The chilly water was also an attempt to stop the lust raging through me. I always wanted to have sex with Portia, but that was because I loved her. Now, the desire bordered on obsession, domination. It wasn't the pure emotion I had before. It was twisted into something else—something I absolutely refused to give into. I wouldn't lay a finger on Portia while feeling this way. Not ever. I struggled to push her from my mind. I felt possessed, and I didn't want these thoughts associated with her. She was the one unsullied thing in my life, and I wanted her to stay that way. I was tired of having everything I loved taken away from me. I'd already lost my mom and Marsha, not to mention friends and countless places that had once been my home. I wasn't about to let Portia be added to that list.

  Redirecting, I thought only of the man—the fiend—behind all of this, my dear old dad. I hated him. Rage filled me as I tried to hold his image in my mind. I hadn't seen him in a long time, thankfully. It had been hard, at first, to equate the man I thought I knew to the man Damien Cummings really was. I'd never known his true demeanor, being continually hoodwinked by his powers. I wouldn't become like him. I couldn't. I had no idea how to defeat him though. It would certainly be hard to do from the floor of the shower. I had to get a better hold on myself.

  I was freezing, I realized suddenly, surprised. The scorching sensation stopped as if someone had flipped a switch. Rising, I turned the water warmer and proceeded to clean up, all the while wondering when the agony would return. Once finished, I was amazed that nothing more had happened. I actually felt hungry for some real food for a change.

  Quickly dressing, I gathered my few belongings, along with the satchel from my spell, and headed out to my motorcycle, packing the saddlebags. Even though I planned to stay longer in Albuquerque, I felt it was wisest to keep switching hotels, so it would be harder to follow my path, if anyone tried. After grabbing some breakfast, I drove toward some low-lying foothills on the edge of town, finding a secluded area to bury the satchel. Afterward, I retrieved my phone and put the addresses I had into the map app. Locating the closest one to my current position, I placed my headphones in so I could hear the directions and listen to some rock music. Gunning the engine, I took off, letting dirt and rocks spew in my wake.

  So far, there'd been no reoccurring tremors or spasms, and the bloodlust seemed under control. There hadn't been a time since my near conversion that blood didn't sound desirable, but at least it wasn't coursing through me, uncontrollable. Maybe the spell had helped after all. Only time would tell, but I was going to take advantage of my current condition as long as I could.

  Approaching the first location several minutes later, I slowed, doing a cursory search for any activity in the surrounding area before deeming it safe to move toward the building itself. It wouldn't do me any good to walk into a trap. Better safe than sorry. After concluding there were no charmed wards in place, I used my magic to open the locked door and entered.

  Creeping through the lower level offices, everything seemed vacant. I made my way quietly up the stairs instead of trying the elevator, only finding more of the same. I returned downstairs and headed into a large loading bay. A metal filing cabinet was tucked away in a corner niche I didn't notice at first. After carefully studying it, I tried opening it, but it was secured. A small burst of power took care of the lock. It certainly didn't seem like a place my dad would've kept necessary files since it was so easily broken into. He knew other witches and warlocks existed. I couldn't imagine him being so careless. There was a substantial stack of invoices inside though.

  Ruffling through the papers, I released a frustrated sigh before tossing them aside. Turning to observe the warehouse space, I pondered on the large, empty wooden shipping crates that had been left behind. Other than being marked ‘Fragile,' I didn't see anything that would suggest what the cargo was. The only thing I was sure of at this point, was that my dad wasn't here. Checking the list of addresses I'd copied from the file in Sean's office, I mentally crossed off this location. Time to move onto the next.

  Firing up my motorcycle, I peeled out of the parking lot in frustration, my temper rising. The trail I was hunting seemed cold so far. While I certainly didn't expect to find my father at the first place I looked, I was beginning to doubt I'd ever locate him at this rate. He was always trying to catch me. I assumed turning the tables and going after him would make him easy to find. Of course, there was the option of doing something that would alert him to my whereabouts, but I felt the element of surprise was the only real advantage I had.

  I could tell the next warehouse was abandoned before I got off my bike. Even so, I still used stealth and sorcery to gain entrance. After tiptoeing around and finding nothing, not even a paper trail, I released a burst of angry magic that caused all the doors in the place to slam against the walls.

  Immediately, my rage fueled the demon attributes running in my blood, causing a longing ache and the need to feed to burst through me. Cursing, I tried to rein my temper in, not wanting to start another full-fledged attack. Still, I was shaking by the time I made it to my motorcycle. I decided to take a break and go check into another hotel, just in case I needed to stop for a while. Once that was taken care of, I entered the room and sat on the bed, waiting for the next bout to fully take hold of me.

  Several hours had passed when I woke with a start, unaware I'd drifted off to sleep. I was hesitant to celebrate the fact that an attack hadn't appeared, since I'd had one after I thought I was in the clear this morning. This time, however, while I had a nervous, restless feeling, I didn't feel sick. The craving for blood was more intense than when I checked in, but I could function. It was definitely a positive sign. I'd gotten more rest and food in the last few hours than I had before leaving Portia's. I decided to grab some lunch and then check the next place on my list. I needed to keep busy while I felt good. Who knew how long it would last?

  Not surprised to find another musty warehouse, I instigated my search the same way I had with the last two. This location, while vacant also, still had pieces of office furniture in some of the rooms, as well as a substantial amount of the same empty wooden crates. I found another filing cabinet in the warehouse bay. Riffling through the remaining papers, I was turning up nothing fast. Irritated by this point, I wished I could just blow the whole place up. What the hell was my dad doing? Where had he gone from here? I was no closer to answers than I had been before.

  Staring blankly at the invoices, my thoughts were still consumed with Portia. I wanted so badly to call someone and see how she was doing, but I knew if she had any clues to my whereabouts, she'd be following after me—if she could manage to convince Sean to let her go. I was pretty sure I was at the top of his shit list at the moment. There was no doubt in my mind that the man hated me after what I'd done, not that I blamed him. I hated me too.

  Suddenly, as if thinking of her had conjured something, I felt Portia's essence flood through my senses. Only then did I realize that the constant terrible ache that signaled our separation was gone. I'd been so focused on the bloodlust pangs, I hadn't noticed. It wasn't possible though. The only way I could feel like this was if she were close by, and I was sure she wasn't here.

  Slowly, I turned around, my body automatically tuning in to her frequency. Eyes widening, I drank in the sight of her standing there in the doorway. Was I hallucinating now?

  “Portia?” Her name slipped past my lips, and I expected her to disappear. There was no way she could've found me. No one knew where I'd gone.

  “Hello, Vance.” Her voice sounded like heaven, even though I noted a tremor, almost as if she was afraid of me, but she didn't disappear. I started toward her, anxious to hold her and know that she was real. She hurried closer, matching my pace and apparent eagerness.

  Don't touch her, the inner voice in my head cautioned, and I stopped immediately, just shy of her. “What are you doing here?” I asked, needing to keep the space between us when the apparition didn't disappear.

  “I came to do thi
s,” she replied. Her fist landed hard against my jaw, causing me to stagger backward, and I stared at her in shock, the punch catching me completely unaware.

  “What was that for?” Maybe I really was dreaming, because none of this was making any sense. Portia would never hit me. She wasn't aggressive like that. I rolled my jaw around trying to work out the pain.

  “That was for leaving me and going off on your own, you stupid jerk!” Her voice rose higher, echoing off the empty walls of the bay.

  I needed to make her understand. “Portia, I was trying to protect . . .”

  “Don't you dare try to feed me that ‘protect you' line of bull again! I have had it with you, Vance! I think I've proven, on several occasions, I'm not the one who needs protection!”

  My eyes widened, unable to believe the small, pissed spitfire in front of me was actually my girl. I let my mind link up with hers, sifting through her thoughts. “Wow! You're really angry!” I said, through our connection.

  “Get out of my head!” she shouted out loud. “You've lost the right to be there! You cut me off without warning all the time, only to step right back in whenever you want!”

  She spun around and started moving away. I couldn't stand the thought of her leaving when all I really wanted was to kiss her. Snagging her, I dragged her into my embrace. One hand slid up, grabbing a fistful of her hair, and I gently yanked on it to angle her face toward mine.

  Pressing my lips to hers, I couldn't help the small groan that escaped at the contact, even though she stood rigid. Just being able to touch her was exhilarating. “I love you,” I spoke through our link, wanting her to know exactly how I felt. “I'm sorry. I wasn't trying to hurt you. Really.” My tongue darted out to lick her lips, encouraging her to open her mouth so I could taste her even deeper. “I just wanted to keep you from any danger.”

  Finally, icy demeanor melting, she opened her mouth and wrapped her arms around me. Her hands first tangled in my hair, then moved, rubbing my face and stroking my neck. Heat coursed heavily through my veins, only this time, I wanted to let myself drown in the sensation. My lips left hers, kissing across her cheek and down her throat. She tilted her head, giving me better access, her pulse racing just beneath her skin, mesmerizing me. I licked boldly over it, wanting to sink my teeth in and devour her.

  She jerked, bringing me instantly out of my lust and I shoved her, scooting several feet backward as if I'd been burned. It was too hot. She was too hot. My breaths were coming heavy as I fought for control, my body loudly protesting.

  Struggling, I clenched my jaw. “I need you to leave now, Portia. You aren't safe here.”

  She began protesting. “Why? I'm not afraid of your—”

  “Because of this.” Moving closer, I flashed my red eyes at her, a definite sign of the bloodlust rising. I felt her unspoken horror, but she stiffened in response.

  “No. I'm not leaving.”

  She didn't understand. I needed her to be scared. “Don't you get it?” I yelled, everything inside me steaming to the point of explosion. “I still taste you! I still want you! I could kill you right now!” Reaching out to snag her, I was suddenly brought up short, painfully stopped by a force field between us.

  “That's what I'm here for,” Brad spoke in a low, steely manner. I hadn't even noticed him, but now I was shocked to realize he was the one creating the force field. How was that even possible?

  “What the hell?”

  “Let's you and me take a little walk.” I couldn't help but glance at Portia, before following after him. She looked both angry and confused.

  “Since when do you have powers?” I asked, and he grinned slightly.

  “Since Portia's grandma gave Shelly and me these amulets.” He raised his hand to show the ring he wore, but then his grin faded. “Listen, man. You've got to take it easy with Portia. She's been to hell and back for you. Cut some slack, will ya?”

  I sighed heavily. “You don't understand. She doesn't understand. I'm still sick.”

  He nodded, staring curiously at my eyes. “I'm new to all this magic stuff, but Portia's under the impression she healed you.”

  “I don't know how to explain it. She stopped whatever this is from progressing. I'm not lost in the raving madness of the illness, but the cravings are still there, just as bad as any kind of drug withdrawal, or worse. I've tried to work a spell, but I'm unsure how much it will help. I'm scared that being around me puts her at risk.” I had the wall of our mental link up firmly so Portia couldn't hear what we were saying. “I can't harm her, Brad. I feel so terrible about everything. I won't risk taking her life again.”

  “Well, whatever you want to do is up to you, but you need to be straight with her. She's been worried sick about you going off on your own. If something is wrong, then tell her. Don't keep her in the dark.”

  Glancing behind me, I realized Portia had left the room.

  “She went out with Shelly,” Brad stated.

  “I'm glad you're both here for her.” I really was. It had been hard to keep things a secret from them for so long. It made me feel better that they knew everything and were watching over Portia.

  “We're here for you too.”

  I clapped him on the shoulder as I walked past. “Thanks, bro. That means a lot.” Brad followed me. “I'm sorry for keeping all this from you. I know it had to be a shock.”

  Brad nodded. “It was, but I understand why you did it too.”

  “I'm glad. Now I just need to get Portia to understand what is happening and convince her it's not safe to stay here.” It was time for a heart to heart with my girl.

  I found her sitting in the hallway with her head in her hands, and my heart lurched. I wanted so badly to hold and tell her everything was going to be okay, but I couldn't lie. The best way to make her understand was to let her feel my emotions and memories—all of them. I dropped the mental barrier I'd erected between us and crouched down beside her.

  “If there's any chance of us making this little reunion work, then I'm going to have to be completely honest with you.” Sifting back through my memories, I started with the explosion at the school, letting my thoughts loose and sending them full force into her.

  It was the hardest thing I'd ever done. Unfettering myself in this manner went entirely against my nature. Yet, at the same time, there was never anyone I wanted to know me better than Portia. I trusted her, completely.

  Terror burst through me a mere fraction after the initial blast, the moment I realized Portia was involved. In almost the same moment, I was on my feet and racing for the door as dozens of kids in my classroom did the same, clogging the escape as we bottlenecked together. Using magic when necessary, I shoved my way past, running out into the mayhem of the hallway.

  Reliving the shock of seeing my mom standing in front of me nearly bowled me over once again. I was glad when the memory quickly faded, but the next memory wasn't any better when I awoke, finding myself her prisoner, and learning that she was the one who wanted to destroy me and everything I loved about my life. I cursed my dad when she told me how he'd changed her, converting her into the very thing I'd been so desperately trying to avoid. She relished tormenting me, showing amusement at my weaknesses repeatedly, trying to break me as low as possible so she could build me back up into the demon she wanted.

  She fed on me often, her bite filled with the poison that would eventually be my undoing. Once I was weak enough, she began feeding her blood back to me, completing the vampiric exchange that would ultimately cause the shift in my very mind and soul. Delirium overtook me, combined with spasms and vomiting very much like I'd been currently experiencing as magic warred inside my body. I didn't know who or where I was. I only fought to stay alive, hoping that somehow I could stop what was happening, but knowing all along it was futile. She and her henchmen were turning me into a monster. I was never going to see Portia again, or I'd kill her.

  Suddenly, Portia was there. I wanted to scream, to tell her to run, she wasn't safe here. Even
speaking a word was difficult, telling her to go when I knew in the same breath I was going to kill her. I'd already decided. Once she had me free, all I could think of was how good she smelled—how great she was going to taste. I couldn't wait to bite her. I wanted it more than anything in the world.

  All my focus was on the throbbing vein in her neck as I cornered her, leaning in for the attack.

  “I love you.” Her quick words struck me like bullets, awakening the part of me that was dying inside. Resurrected emotion shot through me as my teeth sank into her neck and I pleaded silently to God to keep me from killing her.

  Portia's blood sprayed into my mouth, and every demonic cell inside me shouted in joyous triumph. The taste of her consumed me, filling me with untold power, the likes of which I'd never imagined. I couldn't stop. I wanted it all, every single drop she had to offer. Even then, it would never be enough.

  Miraculously, my love for her proved to be stronger, and a plan began to flimsily form in my mind. It was all I could do to hold onto the thought and not let it be swept away in the ecstasy of our union. It took everything in my power to wrench myself away from the blissful nectar and turn the assault against my mom.

  My human heart exploded as I watched her blister, melting in the arc of my flames burning as hot as I could make them. I stayed conscious as long as I could, the heavy magic draining my already weakened state. It wasn't until my mother was a pile of ashes that I finally let go, falling into the waiting darkness.

  Hunger later caused me to wake. I needed blood desperately. Nothing could quench my thirst. I begged and begged, my anger with Portia growing ever stronger each time she denied me. In the craziness of my mind, I couldn't understand why she was treating me this way. Didn't she know she was killing me? I was dying in front of her, and she was doing nothing to stop it! How dare she?

  I was angry at her and the entire coven who kept me locked in this magical prison of hell. Weren't they supposed to be my friends and family? They were supposed to be protecting me. I would show them! If I got out, I was going to kill them.